Bad News

So, I got the worst news ever last night. I found out that my brother was arrested, again. Part of me was shocked, and part of me was stuck in limb waiting for this day to come. I know that it sounds really horrible, and maybe it is. But the truth of the matter is simple, he just doesn't care how much he hurts us.

I am at a loss as to what I can do, or what to say to/for my mom. I want to help, and get her through this the best way that I can. But I am not even sure how I am going to get through this. All I can think is that I might never see him again, what's going to happen to him? Did I not love him enough? Was I a horrible sister? I know that this has nothing to do with me, intellectually speaking, but emotionally I feel as if I have failed him. I feel like I am failing my family right now.

In some ways I hope that this is the end, I really want my mom to be able to focus on herself; Her getting better, and being able to enjoy her life a little bit. But I just don't know how either of us is going to do that. I love him, despite all that has happened, he is my brother, my blood and I love him more than he could ever comprehend. My heart breaks for him, that he is so unhappy that he sees this as the only path to finding the happiness that eludes him.